Wednesday, February 18, 2009

High School Diaries: Nerdvana

Some people are born great, some become great while others have greatness thrust upon them.

I'm pretty sure I was born a nerd.

At age 4, I stuck a key into an electric outlet. Oh, I
knew that I would get electrocuted but I felt compelled to do it. I wanted to know what it felt like to have an electric current coursing through my body. Typical of a crazy scientist.

At age 8, I discovered that my family name was actually this little town in Spain because I decided one summer that I was going to finish reading our world atlas. Who
reads an ATLAS?!

At age 12, I won 3rd (or 2
nd place, not sure) at a Science Congress for a half-assed investigatory project. It was basically a vegetable/fruit juice and when they asked what nutrients would be found in it, I just recited whatever vitamins and minerals I assumed would be in the drink. I didn't really know for sure since I didn't do any actual research.

Okay, maybe that wasn't so much
nerdiness as it was LYING. Through my teeth. But lying involves very complex neuronal interactions and a lot more thinking so there.

Anyway,
nerdically speaking, high school pretty much didn't deviate from my path to Nerdvana.

July 19, 1996
Today, we had our computer class and well, I finished early. The others didn't save last week's activity so they had to do it again.
I knew my tendency to refuse to delete anything was good for something.

November 16, 1996
We had our recollection today. It wasn't that nice... But I'd never miss it for the world. We still had fun during the BREAKS, you know!
I am such a heathen. But I was never any good at being obligated to experience God's presence.

March 25, 1997
I actually used words like INEFFABLE.
I really did. Like in normal conversation. I don't know if it amounts to being pretentious or just wanting to improve my vocabulary. Or maybe what I was talking about really was ineffable!

August 27, 1997
I made my brother's investigatory project for the entire day.
I am such a tool. But I do like making things up and making them sound all smart and factual. I actually made an investigatory project comparing the strength of red and black ants. From the methodology down to the conclusions, everything was off the internet. I can't believe whoever checked that investigatory project actually believed that my brother collected red and black ants and counted how many grains of rice they could carry x time x distance. Who's the tool now? Awesooooome.

October 30, 1998
When I get a job, I will find a tape of Flower Drum Song for sale and I will buy it.
*snerk* TAPE. *giggle* BUY. I do have that movie at home now. In my external drive. Downloaded for FREE.

May 27, 1998
Well, the major news this summer are Seinfeld's final episode, Viagra, India's nuclear tests, the Clinton Scandal (hasn't ended yet), Oscars, the guy who lost 1/2 inch of his organ having sex with a vacuum cleaner and the death of Frank Sinatra.
The fact that I consider those things major news is rather telling.

December 31, 1998
I finally spell WEIRD correctly.
Because I used to spell it WIERD. 'Coz you know, "I before E except after C." Should've qualified that to exclude WEIRD.

February 21, 1999
The boy talk was so boring that the idea of sitting in a corner doing nothing appealed to me that I did.
But seriously, I like corners. I prefer to sleep with my bed against the wall. If teachers in the Philippines dealt punishment by making me sit in a corner, I would actually be fine with it. Happy even. Does that mean I'm autistic? Because that would really explain a lot.

I still have a life. Haven't arrived at
Nerdvana yet but as evidenced above, I may have made a few stops at Geeksville and Dorkmania.

Coming to theaters near you...
High School Diaries: I Know What You Did In High School

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